Prisoner in Wonderland
by Deezaster82
Summary: Italy ran into a human, Samuel Lann, who believe him to be a mental case. What will happen to Samuel after Italy inadvertently spill out a classified secret to him? Well, poor Sam will discover another, unexpected side of the world! Rating may change!
1. I met a crazy boy named Italy

Title: Prisoner in Wonderland.

Pairings: None for this chapter but eventual GerxIta, AmericaxOC Israel, other possible pairing ( ask away for them :D) and possible OC/OC

Disclaimer: I don't own Hetalia, Hidekaz Himaruya and FunAnimation do! I could say that I own 'Samuel Lann' but he own me as well. :)

**Chapter one: I met a boy called Italy, he said he was a country!**

One day,

It was a day like any other day! And it was going to be another boring day for me.

Or so I though.

I was on my way back home after some food shopping and something rather unusual happened.

Someone ran into me, yes literally! It was like that person has somehow expected I would flatten to give him way!

Of course, I didn't flatten, even if I would have liked to do so when the actual impact occurred, sending me fly a few meters backward !

Yes, that guy had the strength of a horse.

I didn't really understand what was happening to me but next I knew, I was lying on my back, feeling very dizzy.

I heard a squeal and the person who had knocked me off rushed at my side.

-"I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" He said hurriedly. "I thought....I'm sorry! Are you alright?"

God, I thought he would never ask!

I just groaned, positively surprised that I was completely fine, not even a scratch, I checked.

-" It's ok!" I said, mind still in a daze.

-" Thank God!" The person said and I eventually looked at him. Her, maybe? Was my first thought. The voice was definitively masculine though.

He eventually deigned to help me up and I was surprised to notice that he seemed far less strong than he really was. Also, he was smaller than me of a few inches. I felt slightly humiliated.

After having helped me up, he started to pick up the stuffs I had dropped and that were spread all over the ground. As he studied every item carefully, I realized that this guy was obviously not educated enough to know that it is very rude to do so

And he commented my taste for food.

-" You like pasta?" He asked with emotion while picking up my grocery shopping.

-" Hu? Yes..." I replied, slightly confused by his strange behavior. That boy was probably a bit retarded or something.

-" Oh, me too!" He almost squealed. " And I see that you've got all the ingredients to make a very good pasta sauce!"

I could only stare at him.

-" If you want, I can prepare you some delicious pastas!"

I opened my mouth but said nothing. And he went on about pasta until he had picked everything into plastic bags ( where did he find them anyway?) and gave them back to me.

-"Ve! What's your name?" He asked. I realized only then that he had been smiling broadly from the beginning. " I'm Italy!" He added.

-" Italy? Like the country?" Strange name, I though, but quite original.

-" I am Italy, the nation, yes!" He said, as if it was all natural.

I didn't believe him of course, the idea of meeting an embodied Nation was totally absurd!

But that guy looked harmless enough and his warm smile made my mouth curve upward before I even realized. I shock my head in sympathy.

Also, This is not in my nature to be overly serious and, right then, I could take a joke, even if the one who was telling it to me was a complete- and very weird- stranger!

He was obviously a simpleton.

-" Italy, is it then? " I smiled. " And, do you have a surname?"

-" Sure!" He replied, his wide grin never fading. " It's 'Veneziano' but peoples rarely call me that! Only my brother does! Ve...The others always call me by my nation name!"

I thought that, certainly, someone would be searching for that guy as we were speaking, because the possibility that Veneziano had escaped from a madhouse was very strong!

-" Maybe I should call your brother and ask him to pick you up?"

-" Why?" He asked as if I had say something very stupid. " Romano is busy anyway! So..." He clapped his hands "I told you my name, now tell me yours!"

-" Err...Samuel Lann." I answered a bit awkwardly.

-" Nice to meet you, Samuel!" He grabbed my hand to shake it. " So, do you want me to make you some pasta, ve?"

My first thought was to politely decline, but I felt bad. It would have been irresponsible to leave that poor kid all by himself.

So, I decided to bring him back to my apartment, allow him to make pasta- if it was what he really wanted, there was no harm in that- and, while he would be busy with his cooking, call the hospital to report his case. They were probably searching for him anyway!

I nodded slowly, a bit unsure of my decision, I was definitively not used to invite strangers for dinner, especially when they proposed to do the cooking!

When we arrived in my apartment, Veneziano immediately started to visit it like it was a museum and, for some reason, he felt obliged to touch everything.

-" Oh! You have katanas, like Japan!"

-" Be careful with these, they are sharp...Please put it back on the stand!" I regretted my decision already.

-" Nice library!" He nodded appreciatively at my book collection. " I see that you like History a lot!"

-" Hm, yes!" I just said, trying not to encourage him in digging further in my private belongings.

-" What's your favorite era?" He asked, as if he really cared.

As an answer, I said the first thing that came to my mind.

-" The roman Empire."

He jumped at that. " He was my grand father you know! He was really a great nation!"

I just sighed. Poor guy did truly believe he was the nation of Italy and it was probably useless to tell him that he was not what he pretended to be. So, I decided to play along.

-" So, you really are Italy!"

-" Yes, I am, ve! But only the North part! My brother, Romano, is South Italy!"

_Of course._

-" And I'm sure you can make very good pasta!" Reminding him his offer would at least keep him away from my stuffs.

-" Oh yes of course, my pastas are the best! I have almost forgotten! Where's your kitchen?"

He was crazy, that was a fact. But he had not lied about his ability to make the best pastas. I was actually surprised when he was done. I had never, in all my life, eaten such a delicious pasta meal!

-" It's really good!" I commented with a genuine smile.

-" Ve! Thank you!"

I had called the hospital while Veneziano had been busy in the kitchen, but they told me that no patient had escaped from the mental department. I explained them the case of 'Italy' and they just said he was probably not a serious mental case. They only committed dangerous individuals or those who couldn't take care of themselves, but it wasn't Veneziano's case.

_I am an idiot! _I realized and slapped myself for my impulsive nature. Veneziano didn't look like he was lost or unable to take care of himself! He was just a silly mental boy, crazy but harmless!

-" You really have to give me your recipe!" I stated when my plate was empty.

-" Of course!" He said, his mouth full of sauce. He wasn't done eating yet and it was his third plate already. I've never seen someone eat that much! He had made enough pasta for a whole family and he ate it all until the pan was empty.

-" You have a terrific appetite!" I couldn't help but comment, it was really unbelievable!

-" I'm still hungry, ve!" He whined. I gaped at that.

That boy was just...Surreal.

Now that we were done eating, I didn't know what to do with him. I couldn't throw him out just yet, it would have been rude, especially after that delicious dinner he had done for me.

But this guy was a stranger nonetheless, I knew nothing of him and I wasn't certain that I wanted to know anything of him, to be honest. There was something with him that made me not-at-ease.

But I really couldn't send him away, even if I wanted to, I was too polite to do something like that.

-" So, Veneziano, where are you from?" That was a lame question, but I couldn't think of Something better at that time.

-" Ve, from Italy, of course!"

_Yes, of course, how stupid am I?!_

-" Hmm, but where in Italy?" I fidgeted on my sofa, Veneziano was seated in front of me, pouring us some wine.

_Wait! Wine? I didn't have any wine!_

-" My main house is in Roma, but I have a villa in Firenze and a pallatio in venezia!"

So, he also believed he was wealthy? Ah, nice dream!

-" Oh really?" I smirked a bit. " And which one do you like the most?"

-" Oh, I like them all! But the one in Venezia got flooded last month and a new floor is being placed. I can't live there for the moment, ve! And Romano kicked me out of our house in Roma because Spain came over for the week and they want some privacy!"

_Spain, hu?_

-" But that doesn't matter, because I live at Germany's house for the moment. There's a lot of work we have to do! That's boring like hell but it's ok because we only work between breaks! Also, we need to practice soccer for the coming world cup, ve!"

-" Germany? You work in Germany?" I asked. It was strange because we were not in Germany here, we were in Belgium.

-" Nah!" He gave me that look that says 'you are a bit stupid'. " I work With Germany! He's my best friend and my ally!"

-" Your ally?" I know my History. The two countries had been allies during the second world war. But they weren't allies any more now!

-" Yes, my ally...Together with America and Israel!" his expression changed somehow. " But Israel is not really my friend, he's scary, ve!"

I found myself intrigued. This guy was crazy, but he was a good actor.

-" Why did you allied? Againt what?"

-" Hehe!" He laughed and leaned closer, as to tell me a secret. " We are going to start a war...Against Iran!"

That...Was making a lot of sense actually and I was slightly shocked to hear that. I knew that there was something going on in the world. I knew that, after Afghanistan and Iraq, Iran was the world's new target of interest.

But I didn't believe in a war.

I also remembered that I didn't believe in 'Italy'

And I laughed.

But my laughter quickly died in my throat when I saw Veneziano's expression. He became very pale all of a sudden and stood up abruptly, knocking his glass of wine down the table and the liquid was splashed all over my carpet.

He put a hand on his mouth.

-" What?" I asked.

-" You...You weren't supposed to know about it" He was trembling and his voice...Sounded like he was about to cry.

I made a movement to stand up and he ran away. " I shouldn't have told you that!" He cried and I ran after him, much by reflex.

How could one run so fast?! I wondered. When I arrived down the stairs and in the street, I couldn't see him at all.

That guy was very strange. I gave up the idea to search after him, it was probably better like that!

At least, I got rid of him!

I shrugged and brushed the event off of my mind and got back upstairs to clean the mess on my carpet.

Life is funny sometimes!

The rest of the day was uneventful, and I was glad for it. The night came and I went to bed, alone like every day. I found sleep easily, my encounter with that silly boy would not prevent me to have a good night!

Or so, I thought!

All I knew is that I woke up with a start to find a man staring at me with cold blue eyes. A man, in my bedroom, in the middle of the night!

-" Stillhalten! Don't struggle!" He commanded with a strong voice and an unmistakeable German accent. He took hold of me and, of course, I struggled.

Then, there was his fist closing in to my face, and all went dark!

TBC


	2. Madhouse!

Title: Prisoner in Wonderland

Anime: Hetalia

Disclaimer: Definitely not mine.

Samuel Lann said that he's mine * Giggles *

Pairings for this chapter: Germany/Italy if you squint. But we'll come to it later, no worries!

**Part 2: Madhouse.**

Warning: Bulimia?

I blinked a few times and moaned a little because of that annoying, vicious ray of sun that had awakened me. I grabbed the duvet and pulled it over my head to shield the light. I was far too comfortable to get up already!

Now that I thought about that, I didn't remember that my bed has been that comfy before. The mattress under me was supporting my body in the best possible way, the pillow was large and fluffy under my head and that duvet felt good and smelled fresh, like freshly cleaned bedsheets, you know how that feels, right? Well, that bed felt altogether too good for me to want to get out of it.

I stretched my limbs a little, let out a sigh of pleasure and fell asleep again.

Unfortunately, not for long!

There was an insistent knock at the door. My first-rather stupid- thought was to wonder how did the mail man make it to my bedroom door. The mailman was the only one who ever came visiting, and only to deliver packages. I buy almost everything- that is not food- at on-line shops.

-" Put it on the floor!" I shouted. I didn't want to move at all.

The knocking didn't stop and, because it made me frown, I felt a sharp pain between my eyes.

-" Owww" I moved my hand to touch the sore spot and I found a band aid there. Wait? What? How?

-" Wake up already!" Someone thundered from behind the door.

I moved my head out of the duvet, just a little. " Who's there????" I asked and realized that my voice sounded terrified. And for a good reason! The door I was staring at was definitely not my door! That wasn't my bed either and that room looked nothing like mine!

Where the hell am I?

-" Out of bed, now!" The voice came again but seemed to lower at the end. I could hear peoples whispering behind the door and the door knob moved.

I suddenly remembered what I thought has been a dream: That man in my bedroom...And his fist in my face and " Ouch!" it was not a dream at all! I HAVE BEEN KIDNAPPED BY MANIACS AND THEY ARE GOING TO CUT ME IN PIECES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The door opened. And,, without even realizing I had moved, I was shielding myself pitifully with the pillow. " What do you want from me???" I wanted to shout but It came as a whine instead.

-" Ve! You're funny!"

At the sound of the familiar voice, I poked my head- well, only my eyes in fact- over the pillow.

-" Veneziano?" Yep, it was him: Same stupid smile, same weird curl on the left side of his brown/Reddish head. Oh no! I moaned internally, Not that mental boy again! As he came closer, I could see that he was wearing only a shirt ( pink, the shirt!) and a brief ( bright yellow!) drop of sweat rolled down my temples.

He put a finger on his lips. " Ne ne! You can't call me that here! Only family and those who are really close to me can call me by my surname, ve!"

-" For others, it would be seen as highly disrespectful!" Said a strong, stern voice coming from the door.

Glaring at me from the door, was a tall blond man with piercing blue eyes. He was frowning and looked not happy at all. His- was it a German military costume?- outfit made him look even more impressive.

-" You'll get used to it!" Veneziano singsonged, lips curved in a comforting smile. I remembered that he was insane and that fact make his smile not comforting at all!

I ignored him to look at the other guy who's expression didn't change, he was staring at me so coldly that it made me shiver.

-" Who are you?" I mustered the courage to ask.

-" Ich bin Deutschland." He stated firmly, as if it was obvious.

-" This is Germany! The friend I told you about!" Veneziano chipped in.

I closed my eyes and took an heavy breath. I was in an unknown house, probably kept there by two-utterly insane- men who thought they were countries. I had believed ' Italy' to be crazy but Harmless- or he seemed to be. But that 'Germany' guy didn't look that nice. Not at all.

-" Where am I?" I asked with a little voice.

-" That's our house!" Veneziano said joyfully.

-" The alliance's house!" Germany corrected. His voice was a tad softer I realized.

-" Ok..." I nodded slowly. " Why am I there?"

-" Because you know too much." Germany said, his voice sterner this time. He glared reproachfully at Veneziano as he spoke. I didn't really notice because his answer caused a cold shiver to run down my spine. I let out a small squeak that should have been a "What?"

-" Germany, you're scaring him!" Veneziano shock his head a little and the curl bounced slightly. The one called 'Germany' dropped his intimidating posture and noticeably relaxed.

The brown haired boy smiled at him and turned his gaze back at me.

-" It's my fault, ve!" He pouted. " I shouldn't have told you about the fact we are going to attack Iran!"

-" Italy!" The blond man groaned and pinched the bridge of his nose.

Veneziano covered his mouth and giggled. " Oh oh! I did it again, ve!"

I didn't want to laugh. " What are you going to do to with me?"

' Italy' Stared at me like I had said something completely stupid- I hated when he looked at me like that!

-" Nothing." Germany said. " You will stay here for some time, that's all! Now get dressed and come down, it's breakfast time! That goes for you too, Italy!" On that, he left and I could hear his steps down the stairs.

Veneziano poked my forehead. " Does it hurt, ve?" I winced and slapped his hand away. Idiot!

The boy grabbed my hand and pulled me out of the bed with a force he couldn't possibly have.

-" Come with me, I will change your band aid!" He dragged me to the adjacent bathroom and let go off me to rummage into the closet.

-" Don't mind Germany's grumpiness!" He said apologetically. " He's really a nice guy when you get to know him better!"

I didn't pay attention to his babbling, I spotted a small window and I went to look outside.

I saw what looked like a wide marketplace surrounded by typical houses, shops and restaurants. Right in front of me stood a tall roman church, one I had seen before.

The place itself was oval, made of paves and seemed to dip down to the center. Beyond the front scenery, I could see some greenery and houses of a more ancient built than the ones directly in front of me. The scenery was strangely familiar.

"What? " I started, but Veneziano was already at my side.

-" It's San Domenico church and this is the Piazza del Campo! It's great, isn't it?" He said proudly.

Sienna? I was in Sienna?

In one hand, I was relieved to know where I was. In the other, I wondered how I ended up there!

But it wasn't really important! I knew where I was, I have been here already, a few years ago on holidays, and I knew the city a little...I could easily escape!

Veneziano turned me over and tended to my wound with great care. When he was done, he grabbed my hand and dragged me downstairs. I did try to remove my hand from his, but his grip was steel-strong!

The travel down the stairs case was unbelievably long, even though we seemed to go only one floor down, the stairs case didn't even turn, it was straight down! Weird!

When we eventually arrived downstairs, I realized that the house was very big! The first room I saw on that stage looked like a living room but the room was wide like a marketplace or so it seemed to be! There was a window on each side of it, but they were so far from me that I couldn't make out the outside view.

Next room was the kitchen and it looked fairly normal, quite large for a kitchen but the proportions were still more or less standard.

Also, that kitchen was a chef's dream! You could find everything one could have in a kitchen. It has two set of stoves, one big traditional oven, a large wood stove in the corner, a large counter on each sides of it and several cupboards that, I was certain, contained everything a chef would need!

In the center of the room, there was a table full of food, four chairs, one of them occupied by a frowning German.

-" What were you doing?! The breakfast is getting cold!" He ranted when we arrived.

-" Ve! Samuel liked the scenery of Sienna!" Italy said, sitting next to the German who pushed a pan in front of him. The pan, surprisingly, was full of pasta.

I had thought that 'Germany' would have been angry at the mention of me lurking outside, but he just said " Ah".

For some reason, I had expected him to be intelligent. Once again, I had forgotten that they were insane.

At the sight of Veneziano devouring his pastas as if his mouth was a vacuum cleaner, I realized that I was hungry.

'Germany' Pushed a frying pan toward me. "Wursts?" he asked. I took one politely and nodded as a 'thank you'. He smiled quite proudly, which I didn't understand, and went back to his own plate.

I ate my sausage slowly, not used to eat that kind of food for breakfast, it was a bit heavy for a morning meal.

'Germany' was eating so much and so fast that he seemed to push wurst after wurst down his throat.

How he managed to eat in silence, I didn't understand!

'Italy' was doing the same with his pasta.

Disgusted by that awful display of bulimia, I looked aside, at the large window.

Outside, I saw a large river flowing rapidly around a bulky castle standing on a very small island in the middle of the river. On the opposite bank, there was nothing else than small hills covered with vines.

As far as I recall, I haven't seen that in Sienna!

-" What's that? " I asked, my voice laced with surprise.

-" Burg Pfalz!" Germany said with a smug expression. " This is the Pfalz Castle of Rhineland!"

Italy's giggle was muffled by the amount of pasta he had in his mouth.

-" But...It's impossible!" I couldn't believe what I was seeing! The Rhine! I could see Sienna from the Bathroom and the Rhine from the kitchen's window. The two places were at least one thousand kilometers apart from each other! It was a complete nonsense!

I leaned closer, it looked very real! I opened the window and I could hear the river flows!

I backed off quickly, feeling suddenly very dizzy.

The kitchen started spinning around and I blacked out...Again! I didn't feel 'Italy' and 'Germany's hands moving to catch me before I hit the ground.

This was all a dream, that was the only explanation that made sense! This was all a dream and I was going to wake up soon!

TBC

A.N: All the landscape/Cities mentioned in the story are existing cities and places in Europe.

Sienna: A city in Tuscany, North Italy, famous for his horses races.

Castle Pfalz and the Rhineland: The Rhine is a river flowing in West Germany. Castle Pfalz is an impressive Castle standing in the middle of that river, near the city of 'Kaub'.

Sorry if this story is a little bit slow, but understand poor Samuel who has yet to get used to the situation! More surprises for him in the next chapter!


	3. Awesome morning

Prisoner in Wonderland.

Characters (for this chapter): N Italy, Germany, Prussia, OC human Samuel Lann, mention of Iceland, Denmark and Norway.

Pairing: Implied Denmark/Norway. Germany/Italy if you squint.

Warning: none.

A.N: Nobody seems to like this story much so far. I don't really mind, I enjoy writing it anyway.:)

Remember that you can criticize, constructive criticism is always welcome and would help me improve my writing!

Part 3: Awesome morning.

I eventually woke up again, only to find out that the nightmare wasn't over yet.

-" What is that human doing in my couch?"

-" That's 'our' couch!"

-" Whatever! What is he doing there?"

I opened my eyes to see who was talking. I could make out 'Germany's voice but the second one was unknown and kinda grating.

A man was staring at me, a bit too closely for my comfort.

What struck me immediately with him was that he looked even weirder than the others two. I mean, had one ever seen a guy with red eyes?

Yep, red eyes, a disturbing smile and white hairs- not white like old peoples, white like polished platinum ore!

-" Who...?" I started but then, he stopped staring at me, straightened himself and ignored me to look at 'Germany' as he was talking .

-" He's the human I told you about."

-" Oh! I see!" The white haired man looked somewhere else, shock his head and smiled. " Good work, Italy!" he laughed a little.

-" Ve...He shouldn't have been there in the first place" I moved a little to see Veneziano look at his feet, embarrassed.

-" The human stood in his way." Germany added.

And, as if it made a lot of sense to him, the red-eyed man stopped smiling and looked back at me, intrigued.

-" Is that so?" He leaned in and poked my forehead a few times. A smile that I could only describe as ' amazed' drew itself on his face. " Terrific!" he stated.

-" Told you!" Germany nodded.

-" You took the right decision then!" The strange guy- another weirdo!- nodded back at Germany approvingly. " But he can't be one of us, right?"

-" I thought that at first." Italy chipped in. " but no." he shock his head sadly.

They were talking about me like I wasn't there and it annoyed me greatly. Seriously, at that point of the weird discussion, I felt like I should intervene.

-" What the hell are you talking about?!" I said loudly but they merely glanced at me.

-" Completely receptive, isn't he! Yes, definitely, you've done well, West, I'm proud of you!"

I saw Germany blush and I thought that he looked suddenly very young.

-" Thank you, brother. I did what I had to do, that's all!"

-" Germany always do what is right!" Italy stated with that chanting voice of his. 'Germany's blush extended.

There was an awkward moment of silence then, as the white haired man's confident expression somewhat waved an instant and a shadow of something uncomfortable passed on his features as he stared at Germany. It lasted only an instant but I felt it very clearly. The others two didn't seem to notice.

Germany cleared his throat and looked at me.

-" Italy and I have to go out for training, we won't be back before lunch."

I managed to hide my joy at the thought they were going to leave me alone for a time long enough to allow me to escape the place.

-" You're going to leave me here?" I said, trying not to sound too hopeful.

Germany nodded.

-" Gilbert will keep you company."

-" What? Me?Why?" The white haired man, who's name was actually 'Gilbert', cried out.

-" Because..." Germany smiled. " you've just decided to be useful for once!"

Gilbert opened his mouth, certainly to protest, but he was cut by the door bell.

Italy hurried to open to their visitor. Once he opened the door, a heavy smell of fried grease invaded the house.

-" HAHAHA!!!!" Someone laughed loudly. " Good morning everyone!!! Ready for another heroic day???"

Gilbert sighed and rolled his eyes while Veneziano and 'Germany' saluted their visitor politely.

-" Good morning America!" Italy said, picked up an object on the floor- a soccer ball?- and was pushed out by Germany who closed the door behind when he left.

I blinked at the door stupidly. "Bunch of geeks!" I muttered.

-" Totally agree!" Gilbert said, he pushed my legs off the couch, sat beside me and switched on the television was the remote control.

I was somewhat relieved to see that at least someone seemed sane in that madhouse.

-" What's with them?" I asked Gilbert. The tv was broadcasting the daily news.

-" They are still young." He shrugged and kept watching the screen.

The journalist was talking about the actual economic crisis, a topic that was raised very often these last past months. The country in Europe that has been the first and most affected by it was Iceland Due to the fact that most of the country's bank institutions went bankrupt almost in the same time, the same month, the country itself went bankrupt. The nation, ruined already, had to face a debt they refused to pay, having not enough crisis fund to afford to do so.

But the daily new announced that Norway, a country to which Iceland had belonged in the 14th century, now proposed to pay Iceland's debt in his stead.

Gilbert snickered and commented: " Nothing that surprises me!"

-" That's good for Iceland's peoples!" I commented myself. I felt bad for those living in that ruined country.

-" He! It's not granted yet!" Gilbert stated. " We'll see if Iceland agree to that!"

-" They certainly will! It is much to their advantage!" I liked to talk about the world's actuality and was glad that Gilbert started that discussion.

He turned toward me and smiled.

-" Do you think so?"

-" Yes, of course, it's a very good thing for Iceland's peoples!"

-" And what about Iceland himself? This is a huge decision to take, don't you think?"

-" Hu? I don't follow you."

-" Well, you see, buying another's debt is the first step to annexation!" Gilbert explained, but I still didn't understand his point.

-" And?"

-" I don't think that Denmark is going to be overjoyed to have Iceland moving to Norway's place! Actually, Denmark could care less about Norway's brother but still, he likes to have Norway's exclusive attention! And Iceland knows that he won't get along well with his brother's boyfriend."

-" What the hell are you talking about?" That made no sense at all! If Norway did annex Iceland, I didn't see why the peoples in Denmark would give a rat's ass about it. Also, Icelanders would care about what Danish peoples would think of it! It was for the country's economy's sake after all!

-" You don't get it?" Gilbert stated more than he asked. " It's very simple: Iceland and Norway are brothers, okay! And Denmark is dancing around Norway quite obviously, Norway had noticed it but he waits for him to make the first step. It's complicated enough and Iceland knows it very well too! He fears that, if he moved to Norway's place, Denmark will never make that step Norway is waiting for! Do you follow me?"

-" Not quite, but..." But he cut me.

-" Norway is concerned for his little brother, which is normal, and he doesn't want to see him miserable any longer. Iceland is likewise concerned about his big bro and doesn't want him to end up feeling lonely because of his own economical problems! Do you see what I mean now?"

-" I understand what you're saying, but it doesn't make any sense! Also, why are you talking about them as if they were actual peoples! They are countries."

I felt sorry, because I had thought that Gilbert was saner than the others, but he had just proved me that I was wrong.

Gilbert seemed surprised for an instant but then, he smiled at me.

-" You, humans, are not able to see beyond what you think are facts, don't you?"

-" The hell!" He silenced me again.

-" For you, countries are just an expanse of land and nothing else! You live on that land and you pretend that it's just a territory defined by borders. You look at your national flag and you just see a piece of fabric. Am I right?"

I nodded because it was true.

-" I can't blame you." His expression was nostalgic and almost...tender. " I knew only one human that has ever considered his Nation for more than a piece of land he owned. That human respected and cherished his Nation as he would have his son or his father..." He paused then, because there was too much emotion in his voice.

-" His Nation likewise loved him, not only for the feelings he showed toward it, but also for all the things he had done for the Nation. That human died but the Nation never forgot him!"

I couldn't mock Gilbert at that moment, he looked so sad, so serious and his emotion touched me. It would have been stupid and inconvenient to mock him.

-" Who was that man?" I asked, intrigued.

-" Frederic II of Prussia, Old Fritz."

I knew very few about the Prussian king. I only remembered, from my History classes, that he has been a despotic leader, but a wise one who had done a lot for his country and peoples.

-" He was like a father to me." Gilbert said, talking more to himself than to me. A little bird, an adorable yellow fluffy ball, came down from seemingly nowhere and settled in Gilbert's hand.

-" Piyo!" It chirped at him and nuzzled his hand.

-" Hello, little buddy!" Gilbert smiled at the chick. And it responded to him: "Pi-yo!"

-" Gilbert, who are you exactly?" I knew I shouldn't have asked, but it was too late.

-" I am Prussia."

_Of course!_

I felt really stupid, but only after I said it: " Prussia no longer exist!"

Gilbert turned his head toward me, for the first time since we had started the conversation. I feared that my statement would anger him, since he really believed he was the Kingdom of Prussia- No one was mentally healthy in this house, I feared for my own sanity.

But he simply laughed.

-" I am too awesome to die!" He exclaimed. " The glory of Prussia will live forever!"

The bird seemed to agree: "Piyo!"

-" I'm East Germany now! My brother manage the whole country himself, but he needs my awesomeness and moral support! He could do nothing without me!" He stood up.

-" Your brother?"

-" West! Also 'Germany', the blond man who left moments ago with his adorably stupid Italian and that fatty America! He's my young brother."

-"Ah!" There was really nothing better I could say. Of course, I didn't believed that those peoples were what they claimed to be. They were rather strange, did inhuman things, their house was as strange as they were, but they couldn't be real nations!

-" Beer?" Gilbert proposed, pulling me out of my thoughts

-" But...It's still morning!" Gilbert shrugged at that, went off and came back with two big mugs full of beer.

I liked beer, of course, like any other Belgian guy! But those mugs! Ho god, they could contain one litter of beer!

-" Prosit!" Gilbert lifted his mug, I politely lifted mine, they touched with a glass noise and he started to drink.

One litter of beer poured down his throat in no time.

Same fate happened to the many others he had after that first one.

I didn't believe he was a nation, but after seeing him do that, I couldn't pretend any more that he was an human!

He emptied six giant mugs like it was nothing, I could never finish mine since I was too awestruck by his display of...Damn, there's no word to describe this!

By the time the others came back for lunch, Gilbert was still sober! He had downed at least 7 litters of beer and he was still sober!

Awesome!

TBC

A.N: All Historical mentions made in this story ( both for the Nordics and Frederic II of Prussia) are Historically and actually accurate. Check your browser for more informations about these topics!


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